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John Tabat
12:47 pm | December 4, 2002
How does everyone know all this stuff about Pvt. Jenkins?!
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John Tabat
1:41 pm | December 3, 2002
In this version, Cortana already knows how to teleport stuff before meeting 343 Guilty Spark.
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The sword of the admiral
3:22 pm | November 28, 2002
And ur story wuz a lot better than my series... If u search the name kyle in the search 4 author/title egine, u'll find my series: After Halo... It's not worth reading, It sucked on ice.
(Diablo especially hated it)
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The sword of the admiral
3:20 pm | November 28, 2002
Oh I SEE!!! 'Cause I find it kind of strange that covies would b carrying human weps. OR MAYBE THE COVENANT STOLE THEM FROM THE HUMANS!!
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John Tabat
3:04 pm | November 28, 2002
thanks, but it is an alternate version of halo. the supplies were teleported into the base.
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The sword of the admiral
2:42 am | November 28, 2002
Despite that stuff, the story was excellent.
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Anonymous
2:33 am | November 28, 2002
I dont know of naybody who writes it on paper here ;0
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The sword of the admiral
2:15 am | November 28, 2002
And I don't mean to keep nagging, but why would there be HUMAN ammuntion and supplies in a COVENANT underground base?
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The sword of the admiral
2:15 am | November 28, 2002
A teensy problem, though: SPARTAN Sam was killed in battle in the year 2525. And Pvt. Jenkins wasn't even born then.
Have u read the fall of reach? I trust u have, because that would be the only way u would know about MC's real name being John. But I bet u haven't gotten 2 the part when Sam gets left behind and dies when the cruiser self-destructs. Or is this an alternate version of Halo?
I'm no critic, and ur story was good, but some stuff wasn't very accurate and needs improving.
Laters,
Kyle
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The sword of the damiral
2:15 am | November 28, 2002
U're 12? Not much older thn me! I'm 11.
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saturn
1:54 am | November 28, 2002
not bad at all, thats excellent when u hear it from me. anti-materiel, id replace with anti-matter.... well thats all suggestions. nice dailogue, "frag out", i like. oh ya, BLOOD descriptions, limbs, most of us love gore on paper.
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Gasmask
10:54 pm | November 27, 2002
Not bad! Keep it up. Just remember: practice makes perfect with anything you do.
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same person as the last 3
10:54 pm | November 27, 2002
sorry. the comments werent showing up.
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John Tabat
10:32 pm | November 27, 2002
it took me a while. im 12.\\
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John Tabat
10:32 pm | November 27, 2002
Thanks, it tok me awhile to type it since it was coming off the top of my head. I night make more. By the way, I'm 12 years old. Later.
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John Tabat
10:32 pm | November 27, 2002
It tiik me a while to write it. i didnt even write it on paper first. thanks. i might make more. by the way, im 12 years old. later.
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Colonel Miltie
9:20 pm | November 27, 2002
Good.
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Sephiroth
7:23 pm | November 27, 2002
Combat was pretty good. It didn't have a plot, but it didn't need to. Keep it up.
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